Don't be shocked:Y Sunday, December 17, 2006Y
6:03 PM
nothing can be as cruel as time.. it let us forget how you really hate that person.. or worst.. it let you forget how much you love that person before. time is a challenge. it challenge the love and belief in you. and in me.. it really change me.. and make me forget that how much i love to be with my frens.. it make me realise.. everything and everyday is changing.. w/o me able to keep up with the pace and reality. you can be good pals with A today and the nx day you turn to enemies. likewise, you may be enemies with B today and the nx day you are good pals. gosh. aint' life ridiculous? is it that a fault in me? or the fault lies with someone else? i hate the fact of knowing someone so thoroughly as much as i hate the fact i do not know what they are thinking. contradicting eh? the fear of knowing someone thoroughly is becos of knowing the dark fact what the person is thinking. and not knowing what they are thinking is much more terrible as you wont know when the person attack you. damn. what the hell. wad the hell has the world come to. what has time done to me.. done to us. is it the fact that we have already grown up? i rather remain young.
i finalli understand i cant find true frens. not that i dun like my circles of frens now. i have little frens. i realise i mainly only have 3 main circles of fres.. my sec frens.. my poly mates.. my colleagues. but frankly speaking, none of them i have dig my heart n soul and pour out all my fear, anger, happiness and future to. none. i learn to keep some of the expressions deep down my stomach. its not that i dun trust them, its jus that i dunno noe how i shld express myself. none seem to be the right candidate. maybe u can say i'm selfish, but i guess everyone is like this. i haven't meet my 1 true fren, nor did i meet my soul mate. thus, i ll continue to bury all my deepest tots.
**(rec'd my results last few days, miraculously after all the worrying, nevertheless did i pass but i improved. 1 credit,67marks and 1 high distinction,80marks. and i'm leaving for my india trip, which i nv mention b4 in my blog, on the 7th. cant wait. and it ll be cold there. so i hope i survive back.)